As society becomes ever more open to different forms of pleasurable sexual practice, anal play is now more mainstream in singles and couples of all identities and sexualities. For men (and those with a penis), it opens the door to intense sexual pleasure brought about via the prostate.
For those already well-versed in prostate massage, we'll be preaching to a happy choir. But, for those yet to experience the difference in sensation achieved from prostate massages, we're here to convince you that it's something worth experimenting with. Prostate massage encourages new ways to climax, delivering new sensations and a range of associated sexual and health benefits.
Prostate massage encourages new ways to climax, delivering new sensations and a range of associated sexual and health benefits.
About the prostate: What is it, and where is it located?
The prostate gland is part of the male reproductive system. It releases the prostatic fluid (often referred to as pre-cum) that nourishes and protects sperm on ejaculation. On ejaculation, sperm combined with this fluid to deliver a combined white milky mixture.
The prostate gland is located at the very base of the penis, right behind the bladder and in front of the rectum. Its position makes it most accessible access through the anus, and that's why the most successful prostate massage techniques occur this way.
Is prostate milking the same as prostate massaging?
- Prostate massage is the act of massaging the prostate, which won't always lead to an orgasm. It still offers plenty of sexual stimulation and pleasure and provides many of the health benefits we'll discuss further down the page.
- Prostate milking is the act of milking the prostate of fluid. Prostate massage often leads to prostate milking, so you can see how the terms become interchangeable. The act of 'milking' refers to the stimulation of the prostate gland and the release of fluid build-up—not because of the milky appearance of the ejaculate.
Apart from ejaculation, the main difference between massaging and milking is that massage can happen externally via the perineum. In contrast, milking is almost always carried out internally, with direct contact and stimulation applied to the prostate gland.
Milking is almost always carried out internally, with direct contact and stimulation applied to the prostate gland.
What is prostate massaging?
If you were born with a penis (people assigned male at birth), you'd also have a prostate. If you've got a prostate, there's nothing to stop you from massaging or milking it for pleasure or as part of a plan to combat a health or sexual performance problem.
Massaging the prostate involves stimulating the prostate to release prostatic fluid or to achieve heightened sexual pleasure. The most common and effective methods incorporate applying gentle pressure directly to the prostate until it ejaculates. This process can be performed by yourself or as part of a sexual relationship with someone else.
Massaging the prostate involves stimulating the prostate to release prostatic fluid or to achieve heightened sexual pleasure
Prostate-induced orgasms don't require an erection, so they're often a pleasing alternative for those with erectile dysfunction issues.
Benefits of prostate massage
Having mentioned one benefit of prostatic massage, it leads us nicely into our list of benefits. There are two key areas to consider: sexual pleasure and health benefits.
Sexual pleasure benefits of prostate massage
Anal penetration and manual prostate massage provide access to thousands more sensitive and explosive nerves in and around the rectum.
Prostate play and anal stimulation deliver a possibility of multiple orgasms and longer sex sessions.
Accessing areas that receive less stimulation (the anal region compared to the penis shaft and head, for example) increases heightened body awareness, bolstering sensation and introducing new sexual pleasure paths in the brain.
Health benefits of prostate massage
From premature ejaculation to overall prostate health, prostatic massage is thought to help with a range of ailments and prostate problems by helping to flush out the prostate and increase blood flow to the pelvic area, including:
Reduces prostate inflammation
Urinary tract issues
Acute and chronic prostatitis
Benign prostatic hyperplasia (BPH) (enlarged prostate gland, also called prostatitis)
Preventative measures for prostate cancer
Some digestive and kidney diseases
Prostate massage isn't recommended for anyone with prostate cancer. The stimulation can cause tumors to break and spread. If you have any prostate health issues or concerns, you should always consult your doctor on the best practices and treatments for your specific case.
What is a prostate orgasm (P-Spot Orgasm)?
Commonly referred to as the P-spot orgasm—due to its similar location and intense climax as the G-spot orgasm in women and vagina owners—it's achieved through internal or external prostate stimulation.
When you orgasm through stimulation of the penis, ejaculation originates from the testes with contractions of the seminal vesicles. At the same time, the prostate begins contractions on sensing a climax, and finally, the perineal musculature pushes the seminal fluid out along the penile urethra.
When you orgasm by prostate massage alone, without penile stimulation, it triggers the release of any build-up with a small release of fluid. However, unlike a conventional orgasm, it can happen without ejaculation.
When you orgasm by prostate massage alone, without penile stimulation, it triggers the release of any build-up with a small release of fluid.
What does a prostate orgasm feel like?
Until you experience it for yourself, you'll never really know. Many describe it as a growing sensation that builds from the prostate, spreading around the body. Those early waves of pleasure are similar to those associated with regular orgasms, only slower-building and longer-lasting, more powerful and intense, like the prostate climax itself.
Many describe it as a growing sensation that builds from the prostate, spreading around the body.
Penile orgasms produce around 4 to 8 contractions, whereas a prostate orgasm has 12. Those extra contractions create a prolonged, more intense orgasm than the usual penile climax.
Multiple orgasms for men
Multiple orgasms have typically been considered something only women and vagina owners get to experience. However, the prostate can provide multiple orgasms for men and penis owners with patience and practice.
It's all to do with the refractory period. The refractory period is the amount of time your body needs to relax and become ready for sex again. When prostate stimulation reaches orgasm, there's often no refractory period involved, so you can be all set to go again almost immediately.
How to massage your P-spot
Prostate massage lends itself to a softer touch and precise movements using smaller stimulators (e.g., fingers or custom-designed prostate toys). Although many men will climax through prostate stimulation during anal sex, it's less precise, generally less delicate, and a little less likely to deliver.
To experience the intense sensations delivered through prostate massage, our guide includes all you need to know to start practicing.
Before you start
- Keep everything clean – Prepare yourself by washing your anal area, your hands, and any toys you plan to use; a decent antibacterial soap will do the trick. It pays to keep fingernails trimmed and short, as the skin inside your rectum is sensitive and delicate. If you or your partner are concerned with any mess or unwanted consequences, wearing a latex glove is perfectly acceptable. It's whatever you need to feel comfortable and relaxed.
- Relax, and take your time – Achieving orgasm through prostate massage requires the mind and body to work as one, so it's essential to take your time and relax. It isn't something you can rush—and nor should you want to—so put enough time aside to do the job properly.
- Getting aroused – Being turned on is just as important as it is during penile masturbation, so whatever you usually do, use, or think about to become aroused, use them. The new sensations you'll uncover can impact the strength of your erection, one of the other benefits for anyone with erectile health conditions.
Finding your prostate gland
- Get comfortable – You'll need good access to your behind, so laying on your back or side with your legs slightly apart is a great starting position. Then, as you become more experienced, you can try kneeling up, bending over, or for those engaging in couples play, the person receiving is often most comfortable in the 'doggy' position.
Lubrication is essential – Your anus isn't self-lubricating, so you must prepare it for penetration.
Silicone lube is long-lasting and great at its job, but if you plan to use silicone sex toys, you must stick to water-based lubricant. Apply plenty around the anus, working it inside using a well-lubricated finger.
- Insert your finger – With your legs slightly apart, gently insert your finger around 2 or 3 inches inside the anus until you feel a somewhat spongier tissue. You're looking for a walnut-sized gland that feels good when you press against it. Spend a little time getting used to its location with your finger, as that will help when you move onto a prostate massager or other sex toy.
Once you've got used to its location, it's time to find out which technique works best for you. Next, gently massage around the prostate to find out what delivers the most intense sensations.
Try combinations of the following for your most explosive experiences.
|Come hither||Curl your finger upwards towards the belly button (as if beckoning someone towards you) following the curve of your body, and slowly massage the prostate using that motion. Start slowly and increase the speed as you feel the intensity and pressure build|
|Ring the doorbell||Gently push and release the prostate with the same pressure you would ringing a doorbell. Change the duration and pressure to heighten the experience.|
|Rotating around the prostate||Run your finger around the full perimeter of the prostate gland in a circular motion. Experiment with pressure and speed as sensations develop.|
|Simulated vibration||There are plenty of sex toys with vibrating functions—and they're there for a reason. Vibrations feel great against erogenous zones, so brisk tapping against your prostate can mimic the action of prostate massagers.|
Tips to master the mightiest orgasms
Take your time. Be patient. It's a slow and steady build to reach the climax you're looking for. Remember, Rome wasn't built in a day, and there's a good chance you won't experience a climax through prostate milking on your first time out.
Take your time. Be patient. It's a slow and steady build to reach the climax you're looking for.
However, practice makes perfect, and the more you experiment, the more you'll learn about yourself and what it takes to deliver those explosive climaxes.
Mix up your masturbatory material, using whatever turns you on the most. Try adding another finger if it feels comfortable and safe; remember the tissues lining your rectum are sensitive and delicate, and you want to prevent injury at all costs.
It's only a small gland, but it's surrounded by nerve endings and really packs a punch when you understand how to bring it to its grand finale. Or finales!
Risks and precautions when it comes to prostate massage
If you take care and practice with a healthy dose of common sense, there are very few risks associated with prostate massage. However, if it ever feels uncomfortable, painful, or something's not quite right, stop what you're doing and take a break.
If symptoms persist, consult your doctor or wellness professionals about the problem.
Introducing toys to prostate massage
It's a good idea to get acquainted with your prostate by using your fingers; they're far more sensitive and will help paint a better picture of your prostate's location and sensations. However, once you've started to feel comfortable with its layout and what makes it sing, introducing sex toys and prostate massagers are a great next step.
Some people will feel far more comfortable using a sex toy entering their anus for sexual purposes, but it's all down to preference and the relevant experience each offers.
The benefit of using a prostate massager is that they're designed especially for the task at hand (no pun intended). They're sized and shaped specifically to find your prostate, often motorized to create movement or vibrations around the prostate, where the user can manage settings that control the speed and intensity of the experience.
The benefits of prostate massage include intensely orgasmic sensations and practices that are good for your health; surely, that's more than enough justification to make it part of your solo sex life, with a partner, or as a big bonus to your self-care routine.
With a little patience and practice, you could be enjoying orgasms you've never known or felt before—and who wouldn't want a little piece of that?