According to an influential research paper published by the University of Chicago, premature ejaculation is the #1 sex problem men have.
The underlying causes are…“complicated”, but usually are caused by physical factors coupled with underlying psychological causes.
So what are these psychological causes?
They can range from common psychological factors such as a strict upbringing, a traumatic event or even sexual inexperience to bad conditioning regarding performance anxiety and frustration.
And this is exactly the main problem: a maladaptive mental and neural loop.
Basically, the sufferer becomes stuck in a never ending cycle of anxiety, ejaculation problems, frustration and guilt which repeats itself over and over again.
But fortunately, a curse can become a blessing as well.
Hacking your psychology is one of the most effective (if not THE most effective) ways to get rid of premature ejaculation for good.
So how can leveraging powerful tools from psychology help? Let’s find out.
Psychological techniques for curing premature ejaculation
“It’s all in your head”, the saying goes, and many times it’s definitely true!
Fortunately nowadays a very large number of mental problems can be effectively cured with the help of special therapies.
One of the best ways to apply this for PE is by using Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) .
CBT involves 3 distinct phases to neurologically change maladaptive behaviors and create new, automated reactions to certain situations.
Phase 1: Altering maladaptive cognitions
This is really one of the cornerstones of CBT.
It involves restructuring thoughts of self-defeat or failure and developing new neural activation patterns that can influence subsequent emotions and biological state.
By forming new cognitive habits and making the person understand how the brain’s automatic systems work, he’ll be able to rewire his nervous and hormonal systems so that the physiological aspects of PE are mitigated.
This step is quite time intensive, but as a side-benefit, it also provides meaningful gains in self-esteem and self-knowledge.
Phase 2: Establishing a cooperative partner relationship
Many times PE is partially caused by low self-esteem and unconscious hurtful feelings towards our partners.
The second phase of CBT focuses on making the relationship itself better, establishing trust, and ultimately practicing techniques with our partner in a safe space.
Thus, having a cooperative, compassionate, and understanding partner can optimize the effects of therapy for this disorder.
Phase 3: Teaching the individual specific behaviors that give back to control to HIM
This mostly involves becoming familiar with the feelings and sensations surrounding the time and situation leading up to ejaculation itself.
By learning to become more familiar with these sensations, you can then slowly learn how to predict when the upcoming ejaculation will occur and gain more control over it.
There are also techniques which can help condition beneficial “triggers” that can evoke states of being or even specific emotions.
Whenever a problematic situation arises, you just have to activate such a trigger and the subconscious part of the brain will “launch” the automatic program associated with it, in our case a soothing and relaxing state that eliminates PE.
The best part of CBT is that it has a very high probability of success, and there are countless success stories who managed to use it and cure (or at least significantly lower) PE.
The bad part is that it’s quite expensive (thousands of dollars), it’s not easy because it involves a lot of mental work and painstakingly forming new habits and behavior, and to top it all off, it usually takes between 1-4 months to go through a therapy.
Still, it’s way shorter compared to other types of therapy such as Psychotherapy or Hypnotherapy.
But what if you’re looking for a faster way?
Self-help can also help.
According to research, good self-help materials successfully resolve PE and many other common sexual difficulties in about two-thirds of cases.
Usually, these resources focus on solving these problems from a positive psychology aspect, namely empowering you to gather the confidence and habits necessary to cure yourself of PE.
We can already see that this method overlaps with CBT somewhat, and that’s exactly the case: they both work in a similar fashion, however, self-help CAN be quicker (in 2/3-rds of the case), but depends on much more on the base personality of the individual, compared to CBT.
No wonder self-help books on the topic are on best-seller lists, and they probably always will be.
Sometimes though self-help can also overlap with other, more abstract areas such as Esoteric teachings, Spirituality, and Ancient Eastern practices. They often work or at least have a beneficial effect to some extent, but they’re hugely unreliable.
So after talking in-depth about curing PE from a psychological point of view, let’s focus a bit on your diet…
Turning to the area of nutrition for help
As PE is heavily influenced by our hormonal system, the activity of the sympathetic nervous system, and the internal system that manages stress, it is possible to eliminate (or at least greatly mitigate) PE by optimizing what we eat.
Basically, anything that provides the body with useful vitamins and nutrients needed for sex, or which has a calming effect on a person (to engage the parasympathetic nervous system) is good to go.
However, there a few foods that take this to the next level:
#1: Asparagus: apart from being a generally very healthy vegetable, asparagus also has tons of Iron and Vitamin E, which can act a performance booster by improving testosterone levels and optimizing hormone functioning in men.
#2: Zinc-rich foods: Zinc already plays an important immune-boosting role in our body, but it also greatly helps with the production of testosterone. Zinc-rich foods also happen to be one of the best natural remedies for premature ejaculation. They include seafood, like oyster, crab, and lobster; meat, like beef (chuck roast), chicken and pork chop; nuts, like almonds and cashews; oatmeal, and Swiss cheese.
#3: Foods rich in vitamin D3, especially Eggs: D3 is considered to be a very important vitamin, but people all around the world still have heavy deficiencies of it, especially in places where the sun isn’t shining all the time. Some people even link certain cancers and lowered mood to vitamin D3 deficiency. It just so happens that eating foods rich in vitamin D3 regularly can increase the levels of testosterone as well, and egg yolks especially are considered to be one of the best foods that stop premature ejaculation.
Of course, there are dozens of other foods that positively impact PE, or even herbs such as Mucuna pruriens (cowhage), Indian Ginseng,or even Blueberries. But more on these in a later blog post.
Finally, on an interesting, and somewhat confusing note, according to some research, if some’s having problems with PE, it’s best to avoid heavy-hitting aphrodisiac foods such as oysters, strawberries or beetroot, because they can elevate the already overly-excited mood of someone with PE even higher. More research is needed on the topic though.